Chick Magnet...Part One

I began this chicken adventure in March. I was so excited to get baby chicks.

While I waited for them to arrive at the feed store I read. And read...... I researched breeds. I became familiar with color patterns. I tortured people who owned chickens.

I asked Jerry down at the feed store a million questions. He hated me. He thought I was making it harder than it needed to be. But I found out all sorts of things in the process. I bet you didn't know that chicken's eggs match the color of their ears? I also discovered I didn't NEED a rooster to get eggs. Nor did I WANT one.

I remember all too well being chased by my brother's rooster, GONZO. He was a two pound TERROR. He spurred my ankles raw. I detested that thing. I still have nightmares about him following me down dark allies.

On March 14th I brought the kids and a box to pick out our chicks. Well, we couldn't really pick them out. Jerry just grabbed them randomly and threw them in. We started with four. Two Rode Island Reds and two Americanas. Brown AND greens eggs...woohoo! I had read that you had to be careful not to let them "paste up" or they could die. Evidently you had to make sure their bottoms stayed clean so they could GO FREELY......Our very first day I just knew we had one in trouble so I raced it in to Jerry and asked him clean her little hiney. I think he was getting irritated with me. But he did it.

By then end of the day I had one more chick. A Buff Orpinton. She was SO CUTE. "Remember..." Jerry said..."These are tiny LIVING creatures. DON"T LOVE THEM TO DEATH" He looked so skeptical of us......

The next day we added another TWO. On day three we had Tayler's friend with us and she begged to pick one out. FINE! What's one more? Jerry explained that all he had left were fryers. And they could be either hens or roosters......Ummmmmm? Roosters???? Well.... these were LEGHORNS. And Jerry convinced me it would be so romantic to have a Foghorn Leghorn Rooster just like the cartoon for our hens. And I had a 20% chance that is was a female anyway. Besides, I would be giving one chicken a reprieve from the frying pan. How could I NOT? So off we went with Little Chick Magnet. We got him home..... and he promptly began SNEEZING! I just knew it was the bird flu and I was in danger of losing the entire flock...yes, flock. So I read up. Hmmmmm....You could mash up garlic in their water or give antibiotics. I decided to ask Jerry. I picked up Chick magnet and raced him back to the feed store. I busted through the door and told Jerry I had a sneezing chicken and.......WHAT SHOULD I DO ABOUT IT??!!!

He looked at me and said, "CHARGE ADMISSION." I stood there holding Chick Magnet. Waiting for him to sneeze. Nothing. Jerry was not concerned. Fine.....I stomped out the door and went home. The next day TWO were sneezing. BACK we went......"Jerry.....I now have TWO sneezing chickens. What am I going to do? It's spreading!" He was checking out a customer. He didn't even look up at me. "CHARGE DOUBLE," he said. My Dad was with me that day. He was embarrassed. He quietly told me we needed to go. So I took them back home. They recovered from their allergies and I didn't lose a one of them. I told Jerry later that week that it was touch and go for a while....He just shook his head and said I was what he liked to call a "Weekend Warrior". That meant I was a ......FAKE FARMER! A POSER!

Oh well......I was just happy I kept those eight chickens alive. (All while wearing my Romeos....)

My next plan was to find out if Chick Magnet was in fact a boy or a girl....

Poor Jerry. He wasn't rid of me yet....